Nesting

It's been a long weekend. Not much to report re: the amazing liquid diet. It is boring but necessary. I learned that I can reduce my protein shakes after a call to my surgeon's nurse. I am able to add dry protein collagen packets to my soups, drinks, and yogurt to meet my protein needs. I have done well to stay liquid but I have failed to monitor the calories, protein, and carb gram intake. I have stayed within 900-1600 calories overall. I wasn't required to track these nutrition amounts but I wanted to. I wanted to stay authentic to the plan. The reason for neglect is I am in the nesting phase prior to surgery. 

I don't know and haven't read about a nesting phase prior to weight loss surgery but it is a familiar phase I remember well. I feel the same about preparing for my homecoming after surgery as I did when I was preparing to bring home my newborn sons. 

Small projects, cleaning, organizing, and holiday prep have been on my list of to dos and accomplishments these last 4 days. Today I wrap up the projects, do a good house cleaning, and tomorrow I pack for the hospital, and hopefully put up my Christmas tree. I know the tree part is early but I hope to absorb this holiday season more intentionally and it will be a nice atmosphere to recover. I look forward to doing all the necessary prep to fully recover, be mobile, and have energy to enjoy all the holidays have to offer - decor, events, and relationships. Notice I didn't say food. This year it's not about what I will eat but what I will prep and serve during the holidays. 

I love certain foods each Thanksgiving and Christmas. I look forward to enjoying them - well, over indulging in them. I will still want these foods but at least for this Thanksgiving I will not be able to eat them because I will be on the soft foods phase. When Christmas comes, I am hopeful that a taste will suffice and I will learn to nosh on small portions of more healthy choices and indulge in people. I am already busy on Pinterest pinning finger foods, and appetizers for Christmas eve, and making up my Thanksgiving menu. The joy is I am focused on making good food to please family and friends which isn't much different than prior years but more fun because my wants aren't priority. It will take some good therapy tools to get through the holidays and I intend to do just that...work on my journey to tie my shoes. 

As I have been nesting these past two days, I laugh at myself. I want closets cleaned out, clothes nicely folded in drawers, laundry completely done, bathrooms gleaming, and everything to be in its place. It's as if I am going to die and don't want any one to discover I was a lazy slob. Truth is if I die I won't give a rip what you all think because I will be walking streets of gold and talking with Jesus face to face. Awesomeness! In saying all this, I confess it does feel good to nest and find myself again. I am an organized person. I am a neat freak. I relax when there is order. I am a more free, fun, and festive person when my life and environment isn't in chaos. For years now my home and life has suffered due to my weight and incapacity to care for them.  I have denied my innate traits and talents for organization and a clean, fresh home. It's just who I am. I don't judge or critique others homes. I am very comfortable in all environments of homes of my friends. It's just "my home" that I am a "tail" about. I am excited for days to come when I am back to sitting on my sofa reading a book and looking at my Christmas tree knowing that all is well for the New Year and the New Me! 

Now off I go to nest and clean.  I am getting a late start. I worked late into the evening obsessing about my office. I organized all the office supplies by putting them in bins and get this...labeling them! I organized all my greeting cards into separate containers by occasion (I have lots of cards) and yes, I labelled them. I organized my bookcases. I have a bookcase for fiction books and one for non-fiction.  Guess what? They are all alphabetized. I am going to leave my cookbook case alone and live recklessly however. 

Have a great day and today's hint:

Start now doing little things that will create the future you desire. I want to correspond more by snail mail with personal notes, so it motivated me to organize a great space for writing cards as needed and desired. 

2 more days to surgery! acf